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Name: Teresa
Birthday: 3/12/1981
Gender: Female


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MSN: siusiuhey@hotmail.com
ICQ: 16183816


Member Since: 5/1/2005

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Sunday, November 01, 2009

One of my hardest time in life

Sept 2009 is a tough month. I broke up with boyfriend, sold my furniture, look for new flat, get rid of old flat etc. No one can imagine how terrible it is especially when I have to do all these on my own. I always sort out my own issues as many as I can without asking people to help since I believe things can be resolved in a way. There are millions of ways, sometimes difficult sometimes easy, but no matter what, at the end they will be resolved. So, in order to do it in my own way, I hope things will become good by my own ability or power.

However, it is NEVER easy.

I am almost there now - got a fresh boyfriend, sold my furniture and someone took it, living in my home sweet home, a lady signed the contract yesterday. The hardship seems to be close to an end. Unfortunately it is always the toughest when it is going to be end. I am super stressed and can't wait to see the result. I do hope people will help and support me while I am trying the very best to keep things nice and perfect. However it never goes to the way that you want to see and I am breaking into pieces.

I take all pressures on my shoulder and think one day things will pass through. My life will be normal again. Normal is a wish. I don't know the others, but life is never normal to me. I just have to face everything in an abnormal sense and try to push them to be close to normal standard. Somehow I also don't know how can I take all and finally I can still simile at all nightmares..

Phew....things are towards the end. So soon.


Sunday, March 01, 2009

I will be on my own soon or ever

Assuming that no one has luck of happiness in entire life, misery has to show up once or twice or more time. No surprise that when misery comes, you want to get rid of it by all means. However if one is not stronger than destiny, the tragedy will fall and step closer.

Ups and downs are friends but they will never meet for more than one sec. Ups and then downs, ups and then downs, they will meet, say hi and bye immediately. How ironic that they are friends but never sit down together and talk about life. This formula tells you that, when you are happy, you will not find your sadness. Vice versa. While I am in my down period, I cannot see things becoming positive in the near future.

Well...

Life sucks, relationship sucks and work especially sucks. I wonder how people can go through this. It's a complicated issue. Wanna change my life but I stuck in here. Wanna break up but I stuck in here. Wanna quit my work but I stuck in the adverse economy. So after all, I trapped in a state of no return.

No return. A short statement about life at present. If I am a computer, I will save the file, store it in a folder, and then open a new file, and start in a new folder. When I feel like it, I will delete the old folder and keep the new one. However, I will never be a computer. I will never be.

It's a tragedy huh? It's really bad now, absolutely bad. I tell myself million times to forget all these but fail. Failure makes one sad and more tragedies will follow. I hope not.



Saturday, February 21, 2009

About me

Just finished watching a Taiwanese TV series. As usual, the story is like the normal rountine of the classic love novel - finally the prince and princess live happily together. Good stuff to burn my time. One line from the main actor inspires me though: I found my real self when I am with her, therefore I need her and love her.

Well...

When I am with my beloved, I can always become myself. Maybe to my colleagues, you can see the me in 20%, 50% to general friends, 85% to real friends and family, but 99.9% with him. And even though he sees everything, he can still show his patience and love. After all, you cannot leave him since you find him.

I feel really lucky that he is now here. He accepts all Goods and Bads. Sometimes I feel quite guilty when I put my anger on him, but at the end he will simply understand that is me, and he knows that I am just being so upset about other things. So he will just calm down, touch me softly and give me a big hug, said 'You know, I am here, don't be, everything will be fine.'

Yes, everything will be fine when you are here. = )



Monday, February 09, 2009

Stomache and Stress

To me, stomach ache and stress always link together since I was 10. Back to thousand years ago, I had my first exam in a new school. For no reason, I had stomach ache. My mum sent me to different doctors and hospital, but no one can find out the reason. I even had my first ever ultra sound screening but doctor could only say I was absolutely normal. Later mum believed that it is a psychological reason, when I feel stress or forced to do something that I don't want to, I will have serious pain in my stomach.

Now I have this again. It's so pain while you cannot sit or sleep probably. I know the reason is that I hate to go back to office. This negative reaction also pushes me to find out a real solution.

Know what, all my colleagues who leave the bank find a happier life. I really hope I am one of them. God, please bless me.


Sunday, November 16, 2008

過著幸福的每一天

從沒有懷疑現在這麼輕鬆愉快的生活是僥倖, 或許人到了某一個階段便必然地遇到那一個只屬於妳的他, 不需要做多餘的事情快樂便自然而至。

有時候或許會很生氣的。昨晚及星期一晚哭得死去活來,但一看見他,便輕易地被擊倒,讓他那些花言巧語所誘而笑逐顏開。理智上覺得不是那麼容易便會原諒他,可是聽到他一句話:我最愛最想念的人只有你一個。小小的我便急速地融化。生活便是你逗逗我, 我逗逗你, 然後就像故事般延續下去。

人總會有感到不安全的時候, 想東想西想北想南, 究竟這種生活會在那一刻突然消失?經常害怕有一天會突然失去了他,或者強撐著那種受不了的壓力會令我放下雙手....還是不要想太多了,擁有你永遠是主給我最大的禮物,看著你那超傻的臉代表著一切。

今天又要聽你的話﹝你會反駁是你大部份時間在聽我的話﹞早一點上床睡覺,明天要五點出發到日內瓦上班, 你也要當我的柴可夫送我到火車站去呢,嘻。



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